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  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

Granted, but he becomes overly nice and you wake up with a used condom in your ass and a box of chocolates in your hands with a card that says "Thank you"

I wish i could find a live unicorn.

Posted

Granted, but he dies and your charged with his murder and your name becomes publicly known as the Erotic Aspyhixation Homo Murderer. Your parents must be so proud.

I wish my SNCO's in my shop weren't so retarded sometimes.

Posted

Granted, but one day you absent mindedly tap your self in the crotch with it, and have banished your privates into another dimension, never to be seen again. Good luck with the Ladies though!

I wish I hadn't lost my rifle cleaning gear.

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

Granted, but they are from Pedro Bill's Taco Shack and Cigarette Emporium. You get dysyntery, and the duty NCO finds your dead corpse on the bathroom floor, having shat your intestinal tract clear of your body. Your mother would be so proud.

I wish I had more sets of desert cammies that weren't fucked up.

  • 3 weeks later...

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