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As a matter of fact, I just finished working on a children's book. It's a special story about a boy who learns a valuable lesson.

It's called "Why Billy Had No Friends."

Why Billy Had No Friends

Billy was a little boy

Who played on his computer.

He played only one type of game.

That was first person shooter.

Billy played and Billy died

For that is part of the game,

But Billy died more than most

Cause damn that boy was lame.

Whenever little Billy died,

He made a witty retort.

"STFU, N00b" Billy cried

Cause Billy was a bad sport.

Other players tried to calm him down

As Billy lay there dead.

They suggested he not play anymore.

Actually... GTFO, they said.

That's when little Billy's life

Took a drastic turn.

He decided he would rather cheat

And let them bitches burn.

Billy started spawn camping

And next he started botting.

But as his score was slowly rising,

His brain was quickly rotting.

As his brain diminished,

Slowly dying inside his head,

Little Billy grew quite bored

And played other games instead.

But sports were not his style.

He had no brains for strategy.

So little Billy made the decision

To try an MMORPG.

That was Billy's big mistake.

He'd finally have to pay.

For Fate dumped poor little Billy

Into a Gamemaster's way.

Billy started swearing.

The GM counted strike one.

Strike two came for scamming.

One more and he'd be done.

Then our little Billy

Made a dumb GM call. "

Strike three!!!" the GM shouted

And the axe began to fall.

Billy was quickly warped to jail

His account received a flaggin'.

And when Billy started to whine,

I fed him to a dragon.

And what became of poor Billy,

The boy who had no friends?

I dragged him out into the street

And shot him cause no one likes a retard.

The End

Makes me cry everytime I read it.

I think Billy learned a very important lesson, don't you?

That lesson: don't be a n00b or someone will put a bullet into your brain.

Good lesson there.

I'm all about the children.

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